An Open Letter to the Hospitality Industry

It can’t be easy to make different kinds of people happy.  The world is full of unreasonable people, mysterious allergies, bathrobe thieves and Monday morning food critics.  We are not one size fits all.  We are adept at receiving hospitality but sometimes have a tiny problem forgetting our manners, especially when on holiday.

You have a hard job and we appreciate (most of the time) all you do to make our experience outstanding.  

There is, however, one thing I need to tell you.   First, it happened every once in a while, now it’s all too often.   It feels like a cresting wave.  And it’s not just a couple of you. From 5 star hotels to quaint B&B’s, your fancy restaurants, neighborhood bistros and hole in the wall joints. In tourist towns and backwater hideaways.

So a candid word.  You want my feedback, right?

There is no faster way to undo all your great service, when at the end of a meal or at check-out you utter these 10 words, “Don’t forget to leave us a review on Trip Advisor!”  Pffffft.  Balloon popped, tire deflated.  Those are your parting words to me?  It’s like finding a second hair in my soup when those 10 words are immediately followed by, “And my name is Patrick.”

No, I will not Patrick, Francesca, Vihaan and all the rest of you.  I will never ever EVER leave a review if you ask me for one.  You immediately bring into question every nice thing you’ve done for me up until that moment and now I’m not sure how I feel about my visit.  Were the insider tips on a neighborhood coffee shop part of a larger strategy to move me from 4 to 5 stars?  Was the free dessert for my son because you found him amusing or a calculated step to get a family friendly tag?  

I didn’t tell my first boyfriend I loved him because he asked me to.  It’s ugly beggy.   What I do know is that I feel less good about my experience than before you spoke those 10 words into being.  It cheapens the entire experience. With that one question I feel you no longer count me as a guest.  I’ve become a marketing tool.

Believe me. I get it. I know at the end of the day it’s a business for most of you.  But in the moment allow us to keep up the charade.  I want to feel like a warmly received guest in some time-honored tradition.  Not that I deserve it.  Reviews are important.  As a customer, I value them.  As a service provider, you depend on them.  As a marketer, I do understand.  But there is simply no tactful way to ask for one -- especially before the food has even digested.  Not when our relationship has crossed from a simple transaction to a personal experience. Timing matters a lot here.  Sure, give me a business card or send me a follow up email reminding me your business depends on it, or allowing me to harken back to a wonderful experience -- but this is one place where a direct person to person ask fails.  Handing me an iPad and telling me it will only take 5 minutes is not the encouragement I need. Pfffftt…..

Do solicited reviews even sound genuine?  My bet is that they are the solid “very good” but completely generic reviews that aren’t worth the time to read.  If you want me to tell people about my experience, here’s what might cause me to take the time (and it is a time investment) to write a heartfelt review LATER:

1) Provide truly outstanding service. Duh. I’m not suggesting that a 3 star hotel needs to provide service like a 5 star hotel, but service that exceeds expectations is noteworthy.  The bar is set for clean rooms, hot food, and wifi that works but do a little something more that would cause me to want to spread the word.  The Southern Europeans offer an after dinner drink on the house.  I don’t need you to entertain my kid but it’s sweet if you connect with them in some small authentic way.  It feels like moving a mountain if you accommodate an early check in or late check out.  I appreciate your patience when I ask you to repeat the specials for the third time.   Be who you  are.  If you are a coffee shop, provide great coffee.  I won’t ding you for a lousy smoothie.  If you are a small cafe in a 700 person town, I’ll understand when you don’t have fish on the menu that day.  We will adjust our expectations accordingly.  The truth is -- as much as we like to believe we are special, we also really like to tell people when someone else recognizes that about us.

2) Accept that some customers simply aren’t the online reviewing type.  As a travel and social media enthusiast, I am already prone to share but there are just as many people with iPhones like my Mother who are still figuring out the difference between a like and a comment.  If however they received outstanding service, they may pass it on the old fashioned way -- word of mouth.  That’s equally as valuable.  My Mother is very persuasive.

3) While noticing your generational demographic also remember that some people don’t like Trip Advisor or have an alternate preferred review site or method to propagate reviews.  For the discerning, it’s like asking a Yankees fan to a Red Sox game.  

4) If you must, send a reminder a few days after the trip.  Few people are in a position to write a review right away (and, if on holiday, the last thing they want is the obligation to start a “to do” list), so a later follow up -- with a clear memory or antidote of my stay and a mention (and links) to your review pages-- might cause me to write a review.  And if something went awry during my stay, name it and apologize again.  We have all owned an air conditioner that has broken at the most inconvenient of times or had to endure a noisy mate at a nearby table - maybe even around our own dinner table.  Feel my annoyance and then carry on fixing it for the next person or laugh with me if it was just dumb luck.  More often than not, it’s more endearing to be vocally self-critical.

5) When you see us trying to get a selfie around the table, offer to take the photo.  A photo of me in your establishment (with a smaller face) viewed later might be the tickle I need to write that review or get more impressions on Instagram.  

 6) Instead of asking me for the 4th time if there is anything else you can do for me, tell me an interesting story about your establishment (that ideally I don’t hear you repeating to the next table). We remember charming stories such much better than we what we ordered two weeks ago.  Or the story might make the recall of our experience slightly better than it was.

7) When I or someone else does leave you a review, please don’t go on the defensive.  Astute travelers pay as much (or more) attention to your responses as they do the customer review. We can tell when a customer is being irrational without you having to point it out.  We all understand that “poor bathroom lighting” is not a deal breaker for 98% of the population.  Don’t feed the animals.

 8) Sure you can send a thank you after I write a review but do not send me any discount or incentive as a reason to leave one.  No one wants to feel manipulated.  The post review feedback however recognizes that I’ve taken time out to do something and makes me like you even more.  

9) Do a quick google of your guests and find out which of them are active reviewers on travel sites or bloggers and then double down your efforts on #1.  We know you are on your computers already.

10) Speaking of #1, do more of that.  For everyone.   Whatever you promise, do it well and and let’s make a connection.  Word will get out.  

Thank you from all of us,

Kate & Brett Ballbach

So, Berlin

One of the great things about writing a personal blog is you have no deadlines.  One of the bad things about writing a personal blog is with enough procrastination you have no one to blame but yourself when you can’t remember the details of that thing you planned to write.  This is especially dangerous when trying to write travel advice with fuzzy details.

 So, Berlin. 

I had to check my calendar to remember exactly when I was there.  It was “this” month (refusing to believe to today is in fact May 1) so the statute of limited memory should allow for more or less accurate recall.  I was also there for a 3 day weekend - with a nasty head cold – back in September 2014.  Congested or breathing normally, the first trip was love at first sneeze so I decided to return “this” month for Spring Break solo with just the two little boys.  (The big boy with the map skills was with his Dad on the East Coast doing college visits which is hard for all of us – more accurately 4/5 of us – to believe.)

I don’t know if it’s the Seattle girl in me or my low threshold for Bavarian food overload, but Berlin wins for best German city in my book.  And I really, really like Munich.  (See my post on Munich.)  Berlin lacks the beauty of Munich but there is an energy about the rapidly changing city that you don’t have to be 21 years old to enjoy.  You are constantly surprised by the amount of cool tucked behind ugly exteriors.  And the city takes their coffee very, very seriously. 

[The two found favorite coffee spots in Berlin were The Barn and Bonanza Coffee Roasters.  Lucky for me, Bonanza was 50 feet from where we stayed and their flat whites were just about perfect.]

So how’d I do?  Totally nailed it.  Beyond being expertly caffeinated, here are a few tips for doing Berlin.

Tip 1: build confidence early by skipping public transportation on arrival and taxi to hotel.  Never mind the cost or the glory of saying you caught the Airport Express to the U-Bahn followed by a 10 minute walk with luggage.  No one will be greeting you at the hotel with a medal for it at 9:30am.   And when you find out the cab fare is only 22 euros, you’ll wonder how big a tip is too big before the taxi driver asks for your number.

[We stayed in a very reasonably priced apartment hotel called Brilliant Apartments in Prenzlauer Berg on what may be one of the best gentrified streets in the neighborhood.   It was a brilliant choice for what we needed never mind what my boys say about the wifi strength and the assaulting water pressure.   The apartment is in the former East Berlin so modernity expectations should be appropriately checked.   I wrote a review of it here if you are in the hunt for lodging while in Berlin.]

Tip 2: pick a hotel next to a great café with pancakes in the AM and wine in the PM.  They don’t have to be good pancakes.  The pancakes will be the siren call you need to wake your kids for a 7am flight.  Be aware however that Europe is a place that loves bookings so even though you wouldn’t expect to need a booking for a weekend breakfast, build confidence and fill stomachs early by making one.  We got the last non-reserved table.  It was my day.

[Café Krone is the café affiliated with Brilliant Apartments.    As of today there are 6,279 restaurants in Berlin on Trip Advisor.  Café Krone is #13.  You will like it.  They have carrot cake.]

Tip 3: strategically select your neighborhood.   Berlin doesn’t really have a center and it’s massively spread out so it takes some planning (or a bike, see below) to pick the area you want to explore.  Mitte and Prenzlauer Berg are both popular, creative chic places for great eating and shopping and pervasive use of English.  Kreuzberg is gentrifying but more “edgy” and home to the live music scene.  If you want evidence there are actual children in Berlin, Suedstern is a cute family-friendly neighborhood.

[We stayed at the Casa Camper Berlin in Mitte last fall when it was only my husband and I.  It was a great location for a first visit to Berlin and the hotel was that perfect blend of down-to-earth but cool in a way that doesn’t require mood lighting and fruited water.  Unfortunately for my snotty nose, the toilet paper – as in the rest of Europe – was not up to USA standards.]

 Tip 4: pack biking shorts or your best biking dress.   Everyone knows Amsterdam as a biking city, but that’s really for the locals who know the rules.  Berlin (and Copenhagen) are better biking cities where you have a chance to blend in as a tourist and not be run over.   There are extensive bike lanes and few to zero hills to remind you that you aren’t in shape.  Also, finding a bike rental or guided bike tour in Berlin is as easy as finding a Starbucks in London.  Maybe even similarly priced.

 [On the first trip, we rented bikes from the hotel.  It was a fantastic way to see the city and also means you can more easily ride through the Tiergarten in route to visit Tempelhof Park – a “park” on the site of an old airfield.  There is something about seeing those wide empty runways that kick starts your brain.  And if you are lucky enough you might see men rollerblading in speedos in not warm September.   Now THAT I remembered.]

[On the second trip, we dared not speak of bikes.  We are having ongoing issues convincing our 8 year old that he will EVER learn to ride a bike.   This makes biking an uphill, downhill, and standstill battle with untied shoelaces.  This is the child who will flail his body into the air to save a goal but who fears any *potential* encounter with pavement.  Suggestions welcome.]

Tip 5:  mix in a little fun with all the history.  The history of Berlin is obviously something you can’t miss, but it’s also somber and best absorbed in doses.  There is a surprisingly number of alternative non-history related things to see and do in Berlin.

[You will no doubt go to see the Berlin Wall Memorial – an outdoor museum that is kid/pet/germ phobic friendly.   There is no better way to understand the barrier that divided a city than by traversing the ground where it was.  The signage along a long stretch of the wall on Bernauer Strasse is excellently done.  I wish I could say the same for Checkpoint Charlie.   The only bright spot around the Checkpoint Charlie circus is the Asisi Panometer, an admission-charged impactful panorama exhibit of a part of the Berlin Wall with lights and sound as well as a collective of photographs from the period of the Wall and before its fall in 1989.  Better yet is the The DDR Museum, a free interactive museum that shows what life was like in the first Socialist state in Germany.  An absolute must do.  Also on that must do list, but without young children, is the Topography of Terror – another free museum that shows an unforgiving look at the terror and persecution perpetrated by the Nazi institutions of the Gestapo, SS and Reich Security Main Office.  When things start to get too heavy, head over to the Game Science Center (also near Checkpoint Charlie) - a totally fun, small space with 20 exhibits showcasing future interactive technologies.  Good for all ages and for hands that like to touch things.  The Berlin Zoo (for those not overly sensitive to animals in small cages) is an also nice change of pace.]

Tip 6:  Prep the kids for grittiness.  As long as you know to expect open containers, abandoned buildings, and unmanicured parks – it won’t be a surprise when you bring a basketball to Mauerpark for the third day in a row and the court is littered with as many open beer bottles as people waiting to play.  (We did however have the court to ourselves plus one on the first cold morning.)

Tip 7: make a friend in the neighborhood.  Local suggestions from the right person within the right radius is one way to cut down on marathon walks to dinner.   

[Our friend was Sadie.  Sadie runs The Juicery in Prenzlauer Berg (PB), right across the street from Mauerpark, serving some of the tastiest super food smoothies & juices.  The boys were hooked and happy to follow Sadie’s suggestion by eating at two delicious restaurants on our street (Oderberger Strasse): the fancier Ky Sushi for Japanese/Korean and Vietnam Village for tasty eats with great outdoor seating.  PB is a great neighborhood for eating and several food blogs (the best of which was Berlin Food Stories) and careful reading of Trip Advisor rightly pointed us to: Maria Bonita for hole in the wall Mexican, The Bird for a ridiculously right on American burger, Fast Rabbit for vegan wraps and hard core rap, Kochu Karu for Korean/Spanish tapas – who knew?, and Pastificio Tosatti for homemade pasta for take-away or eat-in at two small tables.  Two places we wanted to try but ran out of time were Babel for Lebanese and Lecker Song for Chinese dumplings.]

Tip 8:  If you don’t know what you want to eat, head to Mitte.   It’s as central as you can get in Berlin and it has everything, including over 1,000 places to eat.   Auguststrasse is the street name to know and explore.

[Some good ones we enjoyed:  District Mot for Vietnamese street food (went there both trips), Cocolo Ramen for at-the-counter noodles, Mogg & Melzer Delicatessen – a modern deli in a former Jewish school with a fantastic rueben sandwich you’ll need help finishing, and Lokal for a high end, seasonal modern German dinner.  Lokal, recommended to me by my good Lux friend and fellow eater Angela, is definitely worth crossing town for.  Book ahead for sure.]

I asked my 8 year old what I should include about Berlin and he said:  “Tell them Berlin is cool.  The people have good English and most people are really nice and the zoo has animals you don’t see in every zoo and the Wall is cool and the Science Center is cool …

Like I said, cool. 

Milan

Part Italian and part cosmopolitan, Milan feels like a cross between Florence and Berlin.  It's also a city that requires some work to find it's underlying beauty, but it's there in spades as you venture out into the neighborhoods.  Milan is old meets new ...

We stayed at the Palazzo Segreti, an 18 room boutique hotel in the historic center near the  Duomo and the trendy Brera district and within easy walking distance from the train station.  A little pricey and best suited for couples, the prime location (though a bit noisy) and nice rooms made it worth the splurge. 

(NOTE: If you like boutique hotels, I highly recommend finding them on this website.  Palazzo Segreti was the fourth hotel I've stayed in on a recommendation from i-escape - the others in Berlin and Croatia - and all of them have been fantastic.   They also offer a range of prices and have very useful reviews.) 

The Duomo is the third largest church in the world after St Peter's and Seville Cathedral.  It's spectacular from the square, on the inside, but perhaps most especially from the rooftop.  It's well worth the 7 euros and 250 steps to climb to the top.

There's also shopping of course, much of it way too hip for us.  Bring your cutest clothes as you'll want to fit in.  You'll likely start your shopping at the Galleria Vittorio Emanuele II, a beautiful iron and glass shopping arcade near the Duomo and lined with expensive shops but we found shopping everywhere we went. 

There is a well-worn mosaic art of a bull in the center of the shopping center where people take turns spin their heels in three times for good luck.  There is also excellent people watching (and photographing.)

One of our favorite places was 10 Corso  Como - a  store, bookstore, cafe/restaurant, photography gallery tucked away in a courtyard.  The merchandise is high end but it's worth a stroll through and there's a wonderful rooftop deck to sit and relax.  Apparently they have an outlet too which we missed.  We did hit the DMagazine outlets which if you are a savvy high fashion shopper would be worth the hunt.

One of the highlights of the visit was being in Milan over Palm Sunday.   We happened on two churches just as services were ending which was a real treat.

First at the Basilica of Sant' Ambrogio ...

Then at the Basilica of San Lorenzo, a late 4th century church in the round.  I have a thing for churches in the round. 

Milan is gearing up to host the World Expo 2015, a world's fair with a food theme.  An event expected to bring around 20 million visitors between May 1 and Oct 31, we were happy to be in the city before the rush.  Evidence of the coming global trade fair was most obvious in the Porta Nuova business district. 

Sometimes you just hit it right.  We scored by being in Milan on the last Sunday of April which meant we got to enjoy strolling through the Naviglio Grande Antique Market.  A very cool part of town with bars and restaurants spilling onto a not so pretty canal on a day when you wish you had a truck.

Of course, we love eating.  If you like risotto, you'll really like eating in Milan.  We had some of the best risotto we've ever eaten including one with nettles.  We got some good recommendations before going.  Here's some places to share:

Pisacco: lunch or dinner.  Former chef of 2 Michelin Star restaurant (but not expensive.)  North Brera neighborhood.  Recommended by a friend of a friend from Milan.   The roasted vegetable starter with pickled rhubarb, romanesco broccoli and a smattering of other perfectly roasted vegetables was an inspiration.  Don't miss.

Taglio: lunch or dinner.  Modern, casual Italian with floor to ceiling open shelves.  Recommended in NY Times.  Great service, fun vibe, excellent food.

Obica: lunch.  Mozzarella Bar.  It's a chain restaurant but still above average for a tasty lunch and a must do if you crave the real mozzarella and didn't realize they were even mozzarella choices.  Recommended by a friend.

N'Ombra de Vin: an informal, destination wine bar in the Brera neighorhood.  Worth a stop before dinner.  Was packed before we left.

El Brellin:  dinner.  Popular in guide books. In Naviglio.   Very good but you'll be in tourist company. 

Carlo e Camillian: dinner.  We couldn't get reservation so book ahead.  Second restaurant of a chef who owns 2 Michelin Star restaurant Cracco.  Recommended by a friend of a friend from Milan.  

More of pretty Milan on this Good Friday.

The Lord's Prayer

(The Lord's Prayer, in my own words inspired by NT Wright, Lent for Everyone: Luke, Year C)

God, who is not only mine, but Ours

Let us start by staying Wow!

We think a lot of things are amazing, but are they really in light of you?

Imagine everything being right.  Heaven on earth.  Peace.  Just imagine.   Because really – it is the plan.

[Long pause………………………………..]

While we wait, give us these three things we need:

The basics.  You know we need to eat and eat often.

Clean inner fuel.  Release us from the toxins that poison us and our relationships.

A secure path.  Help us stay on the path of true adventure, avoiding the dead ends that may temporarily dazzle.

And thank you because the first pause helped us to remember:

That though we will need to say this all over again tomorrow;

your amazingly right plan - for then and even now – carries on.

Third Week of Lent

I don’t like poetry much

Fragments everywhere

Needing to read between the lines

Juicy language egging you on

But wouldn’t you know it

Love presses between the lines

Demanding receipt or rejection

Like a mother searching to lock eyes with her child

No matter how independent they’ve become

A call to rest, to come home

A soundtrack that plays on

Sometimes so loud it’s a wonder

Other times so faint it’s a mystery

A back rub that continues well after you’ve fallen asleep

911 without travel time

The shade of a tree willing to uproot and follow you into the desert

Love absolves and presents

A safe deposit box sturdy enough for secrets

Big enough for piles of junk

With a special place reserved for deposits of doubt

Insured against theft or natural disaster

I don’t like poetry much

But there it goes again

Only visible for a moment

Leaving behind this bloodied deed of trust

Written in my name

What Would Ellen Do Over?

The first thing I did when I was back on US soil this past January was go in search of fast food. Actually it was the second thing. First I apparently needed to blow a fat cloud of judgey from well-dressed, willowy Europe through the Minneapolis airport past gates of sweat-shirted, solidly-built travelers. As American common courtesy would have it, I – carrying a few extra baguette pounds on my boot supported frame - was given most excellent directions to the Chick-fil-A in Terminal B.

I cannot speak of Chick-fil-A like normal people. I worked at Chick-fil-A in high school doling out samples of the WORLD’S BEST CHICKEN to mall cruisers, learning how to upsell people into a value meal, and believing waffle fries, along with SuzyQ’s, as a major high school food group. Needless to say, I was looking forward to the reunion.

Once at the right food court, I stepped up to the till to order. I ordered the Original – a boneless breast of chicken served on a buttered bun with two dill pickle chips (not to be judgey, but the tomato and lettuce should never EVER be added )– and a small waffle fries. I totally would have up-sized if asked, but Drake didn’t ask and that disappointed me a little. Then I launched into my Chick-fil-A story. Right there at the no-line till. Drake was not moved. He only asked: “Is that bottle of water from our case?” I totally should have lied because when you are giving someone a good story, they really shouldn’t be asking about money.

Later that same day in Lawrence, KS, I needed to get sorted with a prepaid SIM for my international mobile phone. Here I can speak of AT&T like normal people. I worked at AT&T for ten years marketing data plans I no longer understand. At the AT&T store, I was greeted, put in a queue and then told that the “data doesn’t work” on prepaid plans with the new iPhone 6. Apple’s fault (obviously.) Some things never change. Given that one uses an iPhone FOR DATA, we agreed that this was maybe a non-starter and I should probably head on over to T-Mobile. A hero’s return.

At the T-Mobile store, there was a line. A nice girl greeted me and told me it would just be a few minutes. I was not moved. Literally. I did not take a seat or “look around” the store – a completely stupid idea for people who already have a phone and would just like for it to work. Instead I hovered and did that thing where you wish bad on every person in line in front of you. That was good fun for a while until I realized I was already in Lawrence, KS. Also the nice girl who greeted me kept doing nice stuff – for her customer, for me, for her co-workers – and that was making it hard to stay pissy.

The girl looked exactly like Ellen Page except with lots of tattoos and hipster glasses. She was maybe twenty-five years old but her crowd control skills were like a seasoned pro. Not oblivious to those of us waiting – thanking us intermittently for our patience - but also not hurrying with her current customer. Of course, he wanted to buy a new phone. Why is it that people ahead of you never just need a new charger?

Before I allowed myself to get too defeated, I noticed the computer systems were up and “Ellen” knew all the right buttons to push and she moved with the possibility that there might be time for me to pick up a Five Guys burger and not be late. Working with purpose and good cheer, the only hurrying she did was to the backroom. Otherwise “Ellen” stopped with her young customer to admire his well-earned new iPhone6 like any good friend would do and volunteered payment plan options in plain-spoken English. You might think she was just doing her job, but I have Drake to point out that she was doing more than that. I decided right then I needed to get in her queue.

I got the trainee instead. He had never done activation like mine. Glory be. The Five Guys burger was so not going to happen.

BUT there she was again. “Ellen.” She guided my trainee through the entire activation process (after my name) without any hint of hovering or irritation. And he had a LOT of questions. I looked for an under the breath harrumph after the first dozen questions or an eye roll about the growing line, but it simply wasn’t there. Instead she kept up her warm welcome with each new person who walked in and stayed attentive to the person in front of her and tuned enough to my trainee to make sure he wasn't setting me up with a family plan with the rest of the line. It was like she created an energy in the room that made you *almost* happy to be there.

I did get the Five Guys hamburger and wasn’t late. ***Also, my phone worked.***

Sometimes it’s hard to imagine WWJD. You need people living today to show you what to do. You know it when you see it. I was thinking about Ellen this past Tuesday night when I accidentally left everything I needed to do to the two hours right before guests were to arrive. Unfortunately those were the same two hours my children were home and every multitasking muscle in my body was unavailable. I needed some Ellen grace to move with purpose and less pinch.

I can’t say for sure what Ellen would have done but I’m pretty sure she wouldn’t be stressing about lighting the scented candle in the bathroom. I do think she would have answered the 120 minutes of questions without nearly as much irritation and probably volunteered dinner options in normal-volume English. She maybe would have oohed and aahed for reals about what happened at school.

Somewhere between “whatever” and “maybe next time,” I did call a meeting with my children before the guests arrived. I figured if I didn’t get it right this time, it might be a good idea to apologize. I don’t know, but I’m hoping it created an energy that made my guests want to be in the same room with me. The stuff I was emitting before then was all icky and way to interested in my perfectly done snickerdoodle cookies.

Another bonus of the What Would Ellen Do-over was that it caused my little people to offer to be on “greeting committee” and later put themselves to bed like angels.

I really should get some hipster glasses.

Passion Fruit

Photo:  Food Network

Before the juice is sweetened with passion

The fruit must fall and turn colors

 Submit to wrinkling by the sun

 “A tropical twist worth waiting for!” you crow to the mirror

While you slowly release the pinch from your brow

Straight to combing your all-to-misbehaving hair            

Taming what is wild or amplifying what is modest

“I hate my ..!” you almost yell  

While you remember cancer fighting women with heads lay bare

Little by little you see

Your eyes, perhaps not as luminescent as you’d like

But the only decent pair to tell the full story of your soul

Your nose, blurring the lines of the law of proportion

But only in a made-up world where people carry rulers                                              

Where lopsided ears can be traded in on eBay

Where skin doesn’t recognize the season it’s in

Where every cheekbone is in a race to the top

Little by little you tell yourself

This face is ripening and that is good

And while a sexy, pouty mouth might be nice

Your deeper wish is for kindness when you open your lips.

Trading £s for Lbs: A London Restaurant Guide

There are lots of wonderful food cities in Europe but no other place has the variety of London.  You can eat anything your heart desires and it doesn’t take much frantic searching on Trip Advisor to find something decent. 

In one full week in London, we ate 12 different types of cuisine: Pakistani, Malaysian, Japanese, Lebanese, Thai, British, American, Italian, Indian, Spanish, Turkish, and Mexican. (I know my children have more adventure willing palettes than most kids.)

Given the abundance of good options and the size of the city, recommendations are best sorted by geography.  So if you find yourself in South Kensington (where we stayed) or Soho (where you will find yourself at some point in your trip) here are a few recommendations:

SOUTH KENSINGTON

Noor Jahan – upscale North Indian food (so more meat, less curries),  small with neighborhood vibe, apparently where Brad and Angelina eat when in London.   Lick your plate delicious.  An absolute favorite.  Booking required.

Patara – upscale Thai with non-traditional dishes, smaller portions but great flavors.  Another absolute favorite.  Three locations.  Booking required.

Carluccios – Italian diner, good spot for breakfast which they serve all day especially if you like fried eggs, pancetta and mushrooms.  Nice coloring packet for kids.  Several locations.

Comptoir Libanais – sit down communal table Lebanese,  great for lunch, mezze plates and excellent grill.  Several locations.

Fernandez & Wells –casual, order at the counter Spanish inspired breakfast with fried eggs, chorizo and cheese plate options plus excellent cakes, pastries, and coffee.   New next door is Roots & Bulbs for healthy smoothies.

Bosphorus Kebabs – excellent quality take out Turkish grill (no chips here!), very popular.  We did take out on Valentine’s Day since restaurants were packed.  One of the guys working pulled my husband aside and told him to buy me some flowers

Hereford Arms – great neighborhood gastro pub with comfy seating and screens for sport.

Also with several locations for a sweet fix is Gail’s Bakery and Hummingbird Cupcake (which I personally feel are overrated in taste but beautifully packaged.)

SOHO

Satori – authentic pizza from Napoli, recommended to us by a Londoner originally from Italy.   Large seating area, good for before a show,  very welcoming with kids.

Jackson + Rye – traditional American brunch,  higher end diner feel with good lookin’ brunch cocktails.   Solid food but not anything unexpected except for the outrageously delicious maple bacon slabs.   Booking required.

Honest Burgers – small place always with a queue, simple chalkboard menu of only a handful of burger options, rosemary chips, onion rings and bottled beers.  Worth the wait if a burger is on your mind.  Also tried the chain Gourmet Burger Kitchen which got the thumbs up as a less “healthy tasting” version to Honest Burgers but with the addition of shakes.  (Disclosure: after two years living outside of the US, our burger hurdle has come down.  We're just happy having ground beef that tastes normal.)

Frith Street and streets around it are full of restaurants.  Two recommendations from previous trips:  Ceviche – Peruvian seafood and Koya – Japanese Udon noodles.  Also nearby which were recommended to us but we ran out of time:  Barrafina – Spanish tapas and Yalla Yalla – Lebanese and middle-eastern street food.  (I'd probably do Ceviche and Barrafina without kids given limited seating.)

ELSEWHERE

Satay House (Paddington) – Malaysian, more than satays,  came recommended as best Malaysian from a London transplant, enjoyed with our Seattle friends based in Luxembourg and holidaying in London at the same time.  I don’t know Malaysian food, but this restaurant made fans out of all of us.  Booking required.

Zayna (Marble Arch) – upscale Pakistani, very good but I thought overpriced.  Also hit my pet peeve when waiter asked me to write a review on Trip Advisor.    Booking required.

Crosstown Donuts (Piccadilly) – daily made American style sourdough donuts, opened 9 months ago, first tried at Fernandez & Wells who carries them as does Whole Foods, first location at Piccadilly Circus Tube Station.  Less sweet than most American donuts and delicious.  Way better than the Hummingbird cupcakes.

Craig’s House in Crouch End – We got a special dinner in the home of one of my childhood friends (and as an Army brat, I don’t have many of those!) Julie and Craig were so sweet to host my four man-sized appetites after having just been on holiday themselves and after a full day’s work.  I can’t guarantee a reservation, but Craig’s couple day Pasta Bolognese sauce is worth crossing town for.  :)

If you find yourself in the East End around Shoreditch/Brick Lane/Spittalfields, I previously blogged about some things I sampled on an East End Food Tour .

Happy eating!

Latergrams and Photos of London

I started taking pictures because I was outnumbered. 

Life with boys is wonderful but when four minds start congregating around a football team’s line-up for the eighth time in 24 hours, it’s time for a lady’s getaway.  Behind the camera is a great place for estrogen to escape.  Plus, someone needs to document all these places we have been.

One of the things I love about photography is that in the right light even an amateur gets a couple of good ones.   Good equipment combined with sheer volume and great subject material has led me to more than a few keepers. The wild card now is getting those keepers moved into clouds and drives and scrapbooks and places of safety.  (Or so my administrator gently advises.)

A new thing I’m discovering about photography is that I sometimes catch a moment I don’t realize is a moment until later.  Like last night, I was reading Psalm 91:9-15:

“Because you have made the Lord your refuge, the Most High your dwelling-place, no evil shall befall you, no scourge come near your tent.  For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways.  On their hands they will bear you up, so that you will not dash your foot against a stone.  You will tread on the lion and the adder, the young lion and the serpent you will trample under foot.  Those who love me, I will deliver; I will protect those who know my name.  When they call to me, I will answer them; I will be with them in trouble, I will rescue them and honour them.”

As I read this, my mind jumped to this photo I snapped last week.  I didn’t think much of it when I took the photo or even viewed it later but I saw something else in it when I read this passage.  It visually connected me to God’s promise to cocoon us with angels when danger is below our feet.  That even though we see it’s a long way down and it causes us to tip-toe gingerly, we need not fear.  He's got us.

I still don’t know how much I really understand this Scripture, but I do think the latergram moved me an inch closer.  The opportunity to catch an unfolding moment for future absorption is as good a reason as any to be behind a camera. 

Here's some more photos from our trip to London.  Not all of them have a story (yet.)

Busy hands.

The Natural History Museum.

Queen Elizabeth Olympic Park.

London football.  (Colin, the Liverpool fan, checking out the Chelsea and Arsenal competition.)

Norwegian friends in London!

London sites.

London streets.

Boys.

A week's wrap up of dining out in London coming up in later post ...

A Reflection on Spinning

I've never been a gym person, but laws of exercise have a way of bending around persistent friends.  One of my dearest friends in Luxembourg is a spinning instructor.  Heidi is a hard core athlete but uber encouraging and has excellent taste in music.  It was inevitable. 

Now a year later, I am a spinning veteran.  I know this to be true because I come early to claim “my bike” which is front and center next to several of my American expat friends.   I don’t yet have clip in cycling shoes, but that too is inevitable.

Two bikes down from us is another regular, a French man who looks exactly like Liberace and wears a paisley scarf while spinning.  It’s worth going just for that.

Everyone talks about being “aspirational.” I have an Instagram feed full of aspirational photos (follow Nike, National Geographic, and a few amazing travel photographers and you’ll know what I mean.) I have a smartphone that professes to take me anywhere I want to go (just preferably not outside Luxembourg.)  I stumble on aspirational quotes all over the place.  All these things I try to will into my psyche for safe keeping but mostly it’s a mental exercise.  But one of the things I like about spinning is that for those 60 minutes I’m sitting atop that stationary bike, I feel myself BEING aspirational. 

At the beginning of class, I always seem to notice what’s not perfect (and also kind of dreadful) about the reflection I see in the mirror.  I won’t go into the details.  You get it.  But by the time the sweat is dripping and we’re climbing our umpteenth hill, I see something else in the mirror.  I see myself being strong.  It happens every time.

I was reflecting this week on my Year of Spinning.  I had this lovely thought (okay a few of them in succession) …

Spinning is a lot like life.  In spinning, there are warm-ups, sprints, climbs, steady cadences, and cool downs.  All out sprints (thank goodness) usually only last for short intervals.  No one- not even Heidi-can sprint for the full 60 minutes.  With every arduous climb, there’s a downhill to enjoy and while you don’t know it at the time, your legs are stronger for the next one.  No good spinning teacher would leave them out.  Dancing and singing while spinning is always a good idea.   It’s harder on the climbs, easier on the “jumps” and steady cadences.

Then there are your feet.  Clip in cycling shoes are best but any old pair of tennis shoes will do. The key is that your shoes must be strapped in tight. You can't get leverage or spin efficiently if your straps are loose.  I’ve learned this the hard way.   Likewise, we are locked in – bound - to the foundations, families, and bodies we were given.  Accepting our collective of givens ground us like a strap, but the type of shoe we wear says nothing about how fast and far we might go.

Your hands have a role to play but maybe not the ones you thought.  They are there to guide and balance.  Engaging them to grip the handlebars when the pedaling gets hard only wastes energy and brings tension to your upper body.  It's a good thing to remember when we get our control freak on, perhaps most especially where other people we love and want the best for are involved.  They have to saddle up to their own bikes, which you hope to God is in sight of yours.  Also re: death grip, I'd prefer the work my hands be left open for better business.

During warm-ups, Heidi always has us stretch our arms up and encourages us to make space in our core.  She brings up our posture frequently as we spin.  My belief is that we wired for worship -  to put our hands up in the air.  Whether it’s God or Happiness or Big Ideas, we all worship something.  I also believe that our core – that big cavernous space some of us call our soul – requires engagement and constant attention. Core fitness makes everything we do easier, but it’s also easy to forget about it when you’re pedaling as fast as you can.  We need reminders.

The thing about spinning is that it’s ultimately up to the person to determine their own level of exertion. You get out what you put in.  Having someone to push you helps but really only you know when you are phoning it in.   You control the resistance on your bike, just like we choose in our attitudes, to make the pedaling as easy or difficult as we want.   And constant adjustment is normal. 

During cool down or sun down, we all get the chance to rest.  That’s when you, and only you, know if you’ve given a perfect effort.